POLITICAL SYSTEMS DEFINED

POLITICAL SYSTEMS DEFINED 

• Feudalism. You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the 

milk. 

• Pure Democracy. You have two cows. Your neighbors decide 

who gets your milk. 

• Representative Democracy. You have two cows. Your neighbors 

pick someone to decide who gets your milk. 

• Pure Communism. You have two cows. Your neighbors help 

take care of them, and you all share the milk. 

• Pure Socialism. You have two cows. The government takes 

them and puts them in a barn with everybody else's cows. 

You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives 

you as much milk as you need. 

• Bureaucratic Socialism. You have two cows. The government 

takes them and puts them in a barn with everybody else's 

cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to 

take care of the chickens the government took from the 

chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk 

as the regulations say you should need. 

• Fascism. You have two cows. The government takes both, 

hires you to care for them, and sells you the milk. 

• Dictatorship. You have two cows. The government takes both 

and drafts you. 

• Bureaucracy. You have two cows. At first, the government 

regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk 

them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes 

both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down 

the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting 

for the missing cows. 

• Pure Anarchy. You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at 

a fair price, or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill 

you. 

• Anarcho-Capitalism. You have two cows. You sell one and buy 

a bull. 

• Surrealism. You have two giraffes. The government requires 

you to take harmonica lessons.